Remembering Father

I was reading the paper yesterday and I came across a news article about the USS Mercy’s program with the Armed Forces of the Philippines (AFP) to help eliminate rabies in the country. That’s all about it.

I’m not writing about that program, but about my dad. As father’s day approaches it was timely that I read that article. My father served in the U.S. Navy aboard the USS Mercy in most of his 20 years of service, as a dentist.

My father was already retired from the Navy when I came in to the family. I was born in 1974. He retired in 1969. I am grateful that throughout my growing up years, he was there to look over and guide me.

I remember when I was little, he used to take me every where he went, especially in his out of town visits. I remember him most, however, in his duties as a church leader. He was the president of our church branch in the town, and eventually became part of the district leadership. The first meetinghouse (chapel) in Zambales, in San Antonio, was of particular interest to him as he donated labor in its construction. When it was time that a meetinghouse needed to be erected in our own town, he was instrumental in exploring and helping acquire the piece of land where it would be constructed.

Ahh, my dad! Church members loved him. He was a very active home teacher and a loving father to all. Who can forget the Monday Family Home Evenings with the entire branch at our home? That was fun. Missionaries would cover the games and neighbors would have a glimpse of what Latter-day Saints are. Member US servicemen & their families from the US Naval Facilities in Subic and San Miguel (San Antonio) would also visit & spend some family nights with us.

My father was hard working and very resourceful. He is the epitome of the church’s program on self reliance. I remember we didn’t have a lot of new appliance in our home. I grew up just using the same electric fans. We only bought a component and a TV once, in replacement of the old ones. From then on, he would have them repaired or he would do it himself. It’s a shame that I didn’t take on my father’s hard working attitude and resourcefulness, although I learned the former later on in my life, and the hard way.

It was him who taught me the principle of the Word of Wisdom—abstinence from coffee, tea, tobacco, liquor, harmful drugs. In connection to this, he also forbade me from drinking Cola drinks. To this I remained true up to the present day.

My mother died early. I was 11. My older sister married when I was 14. My father then became a single parent to me, until he died in 2001.

I went to serve a mission leaving my dad behind for 2 years. I didn’t want to go because I thought he would need me more. Then, I remembered what he wanted me to do. He used to brag about me going on a mission. When it was time to go, he had no second thoughts. He was old and I thought any time in my mission he might pass on, just like what happened to my mother when my sister was on her mission. I was in college then, in Manila. On weekends I go home to my dad in the province. Here is a father who skips dinner just so he can eat together with his son upon arrival. Later he admitted that he had a hard time eating without me. My heart ached even more. I thought how my father could survive without seeing me, or being with me for 2 years. He only had this to say: “This is what the Lord wants you to do, and I want you to go”.

I missed him so much in my first area in the mission field that I became so homesick that I wanted to go home. I wrote to him about my intentions. He wrote back: “You’re already in the Lord’s errand and in His hands. What more do you ask for”? His response was more like Gordon Hinckley’s father’s reply which was “forget yourself and go to work”.

How true it is that if we’re in the Lord’s errand, our families will be kept safe and blessed. I was worrying that I wouldn’t see my father again, but it was him who told me not to worry as I’m in the Lord’s errand and everything would be just fine. I am reminded of the Lord’s promise to Thomas B. Marsh right after he was ordained an Elder in the church, in Doctrine & Covenants 31:5. He was also worried about his family as he was about to leave them for his mission. This is what the Lord said: “Therefore, thrust in your sickle with all your soul, and your sins are forgiven you, and you shall be laden with sheaves upon your back, for the laborer is worthy of his hire. Wherefore, your family shall live”.

I am still amazed at how the Lord took care of my father while I was gone. I found my father ailing when I returned from my mission, but the Lord provided enough time (2yrs) for him to be with me before he would call him home.

My father was my example of faith and hope. I always saw him pray, even unto death. He taught me about prayer by his example. From our family prayers when I was little, to his personal prayers when he was old, he taught me about trusting the Lord. It must have been hard for him during my absence in those 2 years of my mission, but I knew he was prayerful and had an abundant trust in the Lord. The Lord let him live, as promised. That was one of my motivation in the mission—“to thrust in [my] sickle with all [my] soul”, so that my father would live.

He’s been gone for 7 years now, but the legacy of his example lives on in me. Not only does my testimony keep me riveted in the church, but also my father’s example. I am reminded of his life and his love for me in this very season of fathers.

I love you Tatang! (I’ve always called him this way)